August 07, 2006

Attack of Three Year Old Body Snatchers

There must have been a rattle in my humm, or a disturbance in the force because this weekend my three year old, was - well - three.

Every thing about him. Usually, he is well-behaved, listens attentively, never talks back and never displays an unruly toddler moment.

This weekend? He was a different child. It took all I had to restrain myself from completely throttling him in between my insane laughter from the thought of his about face.

Not only was he defiant, he was openly hostile, ran from me when we needed to "talk" and made comments and gestures that normally would garner a quick ass-beating.

But as I said, I was laughing from the sheer lunacy of it all, and he was crying from my shrill attempts to keep laughter and anger in check that I didn't have the heart to beat him.

No, instead he was met with wimpy mom-a mom who I usually reserve for children who are not mine.

Take for instance the trip to Costco - where he told me - nay demanded that I buy him a certain toy because "he said so." Then there was the moment when I told him to sit in time out and not only did he say "No" but ran from me - MORE THAN ONCE! Seriously, my angel child turned into a demon child in a split second and all I could do was laugh. He was held down in time out, and then he was sent to bed, but not before I realized I sounded exactly like one of those mom's I'm always turning my nose up at : "if you don't . . . I'm gonna spank you . . . I mean it" and I didn't. If ever he should have been spanked - I missed the moment. Trust me, he was thoroughly wounded after being reprimanded in front of several people (he hates to be embarrassed) though. But I'm not usually that mom, and he is not usually that child.

I'm not sure what was going through his brain as he knows that he just cannot test the waters, but he was.

But in the end, he got his. My trusty two year old pal made sure he had his share of pain this weekend. He has a very large bruise on his noggin and two very scraped knees. Oh, and a little wounded pride too.

Me? I'm just glad the weekend is over - and he has lived through it! I'll chock it up to being three, and maybe just a little too much sugar.

How was your weekend?

Posted by Oddybobo at August 7, 2006 01:10 PM | TrackBack

Hey, it gets better. My 17 year old daughter just finished cleaning the kitchen AND scrubbing the floor--and I didn't even have to say anything to her. She just did it on her own. Frankly, I'm speechless!

Posted by: 40 Ounce Loudmouth at August 7, 2006 02:51 PM

Ohhh.... Must have been the phase of the moon or something, Oddy. *Both* of my (usually very well behaved) girls were terrible yesterday. Snotty, mulish, defiant, pissy, disruptive - and that was at church!

They subsequently spent 4 hours yesterday afternoon alternating between cleaning chores and sitting *very* quietly with a book.

I was just about ready to throttle them both....

Posted by: Richmond at August 7, 2006 03:19 PM

Mine waited until today. Bou tried to talk to me on the phone while Tot through a tamtrum... sigh...

Posted by: vw bug at August 7, 2006 03:33 PM

All I can say is Youch. Yeah, I remember those days...the only advantage I had, was I could send them home!

Hope this phase passes quickly - for both your sakes.


Posted by: Tammi at August 7, 2006 06:44 PM

Heheheh... Uh... I mean: Good luck, Oddy. Yeah. That's what that meant...

Posted by: That 1 Guy at August 7, 2006 07:08 PM

Sugar = kiddie cocaine.

Posted by: Jerry at August 7, 2006 10:29 PM

It's the age. I used to say, "Who stole my child and replaced him with this?!" Age 4 is wonderful. It's my favorite age.

Posted by: Bou at August 8, 2006 10:22 PM

My daughter, after a horrible year of being two, was fabulous at three. But my son was great at two, and went through his terrible two's at three. Some weekends, it almost feels like a relief to go back to work.

Posted by: trouble at August 9, 2006 09:11 AM

He sounds like ... well ... a boy. Which is to say he's acting like a puppy and won't respond to your pleading "We need to talk." All the conversation that a defiant boy can understand is a sharp swat on the tush and a firm "No!" The swat doesn't even need to be painful to be effective -- the point is to let him know you disapprove of his unruly behavior.

Please understand, there is absolutely nothing wrong with boys acting like boys, so there's no need to shame him just because he's decided to test the limits of his domain, but you do need to make those limits clear. He needs to know that three-year-olds do not make the rules.

Posted by: Bob at August 9, 2006 10:44 AM

So why didn't my usually unruly boy become well-behaved during this aberration?

Posted by: tink at August 10, 2006 03:58 PM