March 10, 2010

Happy Birthday Boy

My boy turns 7 today. 7 years ago at 7 in the morning, I was crooning at him in an empty labor and delivery room as he was born at nearly the change in shift and everyone had cleared out.

He was a tiny boy. 6lbs. 12 oz and 18 inches long. He was mine. He had ice-blue eyes that when he opened them, they cut through straight to the heart and would melt ice floes within.

He was mine. I would literally stare at him for hours on end. I'd watch him sleep, breathe, sigh, smile while dreaming, twitch, shudder and move. I'd watch him eat. I'd watch his expressions as he caught new or different sounds. I was fixated on him.

He was mine. He is mine. I thank the good Lord for him every single day. He is what gets me through, what powers my days, what leads me on. He is mine. He is 7. He is growing before my eyes and I'm not sure where the time has gone. He is 7. A young man - a baby still - struggling to figure out the blows life has recently dealt him. He is 7 and has a world of possibilities laid bare before him from which to pick and choose at his whim.

We lay down at night together and we have an "I love you" contest. I usually tell him I love him to the moon and back and he usually tells me he loves me "To infinity and beyond" and then we add things to the infinity... and retire in fits of laughter.

So, to my Boy, Happy 7th Birthday, you are so very loved, by so many people, shall you never ever doubt it. I cannot believe how you have grown and I see nothing but potential in your future. I love you to the moon and back my sweet, sweet boy. I love you to infinity and beyond - squared!

January-February 2010 077.jpg


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March 09, 2010

The Demise of My Marriage Is Complete

Well? It's over. I am officially divorced. What do they call that? Tragic? Perhaps.

Tragedy was when my husband of 13 years busted his head and had a massive brain injury....

Tragedy was when my husband of 14 years didn't fully recover and then turned a little on the violent side.

Tragedy was when my husband of nearly 15 years decided he'd rather screw a bimbo then work on our marriage.

So yes. The end of my marriage is tragic.

But . . . . I spent the weekend with two very single and very gorgeous guys who paid an adequate level of attention to the newly single me ...

So? While tragic, it's a new chapter. I'm only 34 (on Saturday) I've got a whole life ahead of me. Right? Right? Please tell me I'm right . . .

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